Hi there. This is Gentoo. It's a good distribution. Yours isn't. You know why?
SECTION I: Community.
This is a very important factor when considering a distribution, as you don't want to share your opinion with illiterate 8 year olds. It's why I don't play Call of Duty, Battlefield, or DoTA. Let's look at Ubuntu's community.
(quoting from an actual post on the ubuntu forums)
Oh look! A technologically impaired person! Turns out, this isn't very uncommon in the Ubuntu community. Now let's see a typical newcomer to the gentoo community.
(actual post from the gentoo forums)
What a gentleman. He:
* Uses proper grammar
* Can Google his problems
* Is straightforward with his question
* Probably drinks fine wine, wears suits, is a connoisseur of aged cheeses, and has a monocle (or two).
Section II: Included software.
Included software is a necessity. If any modern OS came without a browsProxy-Connection: keep-alive
or command line, what would you do with your life? Let's see Ubuntu's included software.
* Bluetooth analyzer
* other generic software
Boring. Gentoo comes with exciting programs like:
* Funzip (It has fun in the name. Even compressing files is fun in gentoo.)
* Sandbox (How can a child's toy not be fun on Gentoo?)
* Mailbot (Robots are badass.)
Section III: Portage
apt-get install audacious
Have you ever been strapped to a bomb and the only way to deactivate it is to install a program, and the difference between life and death is a few letters? I have. Enough said.